Priorities (you're doing it wrong)
Posted on Sep 19, 2011 at 11PM
Newscaster: "...a brutal murder-suicide left two people dead today. Police say the mutilated woman's body was found first, followed by the body of her husband, who had killed himself."
Mom and Dad: *poker face*
Me: "Wow, that's awful."
Newscaster: "They also found the family dog, who had also been shot to death."
Mom and Dad: *horrified gasp*
Mom: "Why would he do that?!"
Me: "Are you serious?"
Dad: "Who would do that to a defenseless dog?"
1 note
8 months ago
Posted on Sep 19, 2011 at 7PM
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My sister posted this on Facebook - I love her!
3 notes
8 months ago
Posted on Sep 17, 2011 at 7PM
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Des Moines, Iowa state capitol, law library, stairs (by groenling)
*salivates*
Walk in on my older brother watching Beauty and the Beast.
Posted on Sep 16, 2011 at 2PM
Me: I don't think I've ever loved you more than I do right now.
Brother: Shut up. So like, I don't get it. What's the spell Beast is under?
Me: He was mean to a witch, so she made him ugly until he could learn to love and be loved back. He had to do it before he was twenty-one or he'd be a beast forever.
Brother: Oh.
Me: How does Mrs. Potts have such a young kid? She's really old!
Brother: This movie tripped me out - I haven't seen it in like, fifteen years.
Me: I haven't seen it in like, fifteen days.
Brother: Are you five?
5 notes
8 months ago
![anoceanfullofbowlingballs - [between clever lines]](http://25.media.tumblr.com/avatar_069e74ad6b4c_16.png "anoceanfullofbowlingballs - [between clever lines]"){kind=avatar}
